Litany against decaffeination
The Litany against decaffeination (also known by its first sentence, I must not decaffeinate) is a parody of Frank Herbert's Litany against fear.
The Litany
The complete text reads:
I must not decaffeinate. Decaffeination is the mind-killer. Decaffeination is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my decaffeination. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the decaffeination has gone there will be a steaming hot cup of Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee. Only the Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee and I will remain.
Shortened version for social media:
I must not decaffeinate
Decaffeination is the mind-killer
—I will face my decaffeination—
Where the decaffeination has gone there will be a steaming hot cup of Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
Only the Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee and I will remain
https://gnomonchronicles.com/wiki/Litany_against_decaffeination_(nonfiction)
Litany against fear
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
-- Frank Herbert
https://dune.fandom.com/wiki/Litany_Against_Fear
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