Daddy Warbucks: Difference between revisions
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He is [[bald (nonfiction)]]. | He is [[bald (nonfiction)]]. | ||
Warbucks frequently misses opportunities to reach his goals, due to penny-pinching. | |||
Daddy Warbucks has made a great many enemies over the centuries. | Daddy Warbucks has made a great many enemies over the centuries. | ||
Warbucks has evidence that his financial empire is plagued by millions of tiny robberies, day after day, hour after hour -- it would be computational folly to demand an accurate accounting. | Warbucks has evidence that his financial empire is plagued by millions of tiny robberies, day after day, hour after hour -- it would be computational folly to demand an accurate accounting. | ||
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Furthermore, [[The Eel]] covets wealth, a quality that Warbucks finds repellent: to acquire is good, to possess is good, but to covet wastes [[Computational complexity theory (nonfiction)|computational resources (nonfiction)]]. | Furthermore, [[The Eel]] covets wealth, a quality that Warbucks finds repellent: to acquire is good, to possess is good, but to covet wastes [[Computational complexity theory (nonfiction)|computational resources (nonfiction)]]. | ||
[[Euphoriolanus]] dissipates himself in extreme pleasures at any price. "Repellent" is too kind a word, according to Warbucks (source needed). | [[Euphoriolanus]] dissipates himself in extreme pleasures at any price. "Repellent" is too kind a word, according to Warbucks (source needed). | ||
Sadly, he is Warbucks' nephew, and so cannot be killed out of hand, but must be accepted as one of those family burdens which a family man must bear. | Sadly, he is Warbucks' nephew, and so cannot be killed out of hand, but must be accepted as one of those family burdens which a family man must bear. | ||
== In the News == | |||
<gallery mode="traditional"> | |||
File:Red_dye_cash.jpg||Aftermath of a Daddy Warbucks temper tantrum. The dye pack exploded and the stack of 20s were abandoned on the sidewalk. | |||
</gallery> | |||
== Fiction cross reference == | == Fiction cross reference == |
Revision as of 19:51, 22 June 2016
Daddy Warbucks is a supervillain (nonfiction) who seeks out and invests in cost-effective ways to destroy all creation.
He is bald (nonfiction).
Warbucks frequently misses opportunities to reach his goals, due to penny-pinching.
Daddy Warbucks has made a great many enemies over the centuries.
Warbucks has evidence that his financial empire is plagued by millions of tiny robberies, day after day, hour after hour -- it would be computational folly to demand an accurate accounting.
The total loss amounts to pennies, but Warbucks made is fortune literally pinching pennies, and in his later years his stinginess has grown to magisterial proportions.
Warbucks can't prove that The Eel is behind the robberies.
But he knows it, much in the same way that he knows that the Kentucky Bluegrass on his mighty Lawn will wither and die if he fails to keep a close eye on it by night.
Furthermore, The Eel covets wealth, a quality that Warbucks finds repellent: to acquire is good, to possess is good, but to covet wastes computational resources (nonfiction).
Euphoriolanus dissipates himself in extreme pleasures at any price. "Repellent" is too kind a word, according to Warbucks (source needed).
Sadly, he is Warbucks' nephew, and so cannot be killed out of hand, but must be accepted as one of those family burdens which a family man must bear.