I have broken more hoop robots

I have broken more ingenious hoop robots is a parody by Karl Jones of Donald Trump's speech in which he mentions Elton John and records.

Text

I have broken more ingenious hoop robots. There seem to be a lot of hoop robots. And I, by the way, I don’t have a robotic appendage. I don’t have a six-million-dollar arm. No arm. Robots have arms. And lots of other people helping. No, we’ve broken a lot of robots. We’ve broken virtually every robot. Because you know, look, I only need this space. They need many more robots. For basketball, for hockey and all of the sports, they need a lot of robots. We don’t need it. We have people in that space. So we break all of these robots. Really, we do it without, like, the hoopical robots. This is the only hoopical – the mouth. And hopefully the brain attached to the mouth, right? The brain. More important than the mouth is the brain. The brain is much more important.

Original speech

Excerpt from Trump's original speech:

I have broken more Elton John records. He seems to have a lot of records. And I, by the way, I don’t have a musical instrument. I don’t have a guitar or an organ. No organ. Elton has an organ. And lots of other people helping. No, we’ve broken a lot of records. We’ve broken virtually every record. Because you know, look, I only need this space. They need much more room. For basketball, for hockey and all of the sports, they need a lot of room. We don’t need it. We have people in that space. So we break all of these records. Really, we do it without, like, the musical instruments. This is the only musical – the mouth. And hopefully the brain attached to the mouth, right? The brain. More important than the mouth is the brain. The brain is much more important.

Rolling Stone magazine, the source for this quote, added:

"A representative for Elton John declined to comment on the president’s remarks."

• Extremely Focused Trump Now Comparing Himself to Elton John - "The president inexplicably invoked the legendary artist during a campaign-style rally Thursday night" - by Ryan Bort @ Rolling Stone (July 2, 2018)

Origin

Jones wrote the parody in a comment on the Boing Boing bulletin board.

• Comment @ Boing Boing

Fiction cross-reference

• Gnomon algorithm
• Gnomon Chronicles

Nonfiction cross-reference

• Donald Trump (nonfiction)